How to make Wisdom based decisions
You ever wonder why bad habits stick so fast and good ones don’t? In one of Craig Groeschel’s recent podcast he talks about this and you can listen here. The ultimate reason he suggests is that bad habits have an instant gratification connected to them, and their negative long term affects come later down the road. Whereas good habits usually have very little instant gratification and their reward isn’t realized until a later date. Think exercising or not exercising, eating that cake or not eating it, apologizing immediately or waiting to apologize.
Beyond just habits, I think there are a lot of things like this in our life. Maybe it’s a dream you’re chasing. Maybe it’s a vacation, a career move, or a fitness goal. At the end of the day, we all know what we need to do, but the desire to do It isn’t always there. Most of us have all learned and earned the necessary wisdom to accomplish that set goal.
If I want to go on that vacation I should probably set a monthly budget, make a vaca fund, and slowly slip extra money into it. And when I’m lucky enough to have some extra dough drop in my lap, I should probably throw it in the fund. But, then I start thinking about getting a new phone, and maybe going out to eat an extra night, and going to see a movie. So at the end of the month I haven’t really added any extra to the vacation fund.
With a career move or jump we usually know we need to start working harder or do the small steps necessary to make it happen. But being comfortable can sometimes paralyze us from moving. And with our health, we all know how good junk food taste, so I don’t even have to go on. Here’s the issue:
Wisdom whispers and our desires scream.
Our hard-earned wisdom that we have learned through experience, and trial and error, is one of our greatest assets in building a healthier whole life for ourselves. The problem is that for some reason it sits in the back of the room in our mind. It’s a faint whisper, and a far off signpost at best.
I believe the people who are successful in their life, whether it’s in their relationships, finances, career, health, or mindset have learned to make the voice of their learned wisdom louder, and the flashy desires quieter.
For me, I’m a big dreamer, and I’ve got lots of goals, and I’m a pretty great starter. The problem is I get really excited about my ideas and I start big. Which usually means it only takes a couple of days, and maybe even hours before I burn out on them, give up and move on to the next thing.
Take this blog for example. My big time dream is for IN THE MEANTIME to help people all over the world build healthier whole lives. I can envision a retreat center, multiple podcast and shows, speaking around the world, coaching programs, and more. I really want to see that happen. So, my desire is to spend every single day throwing up content on all my socials talking and learning about it. But I’ve tried that, and it didn’t last long.
So, instead I’m starting with a much more manageable goal: produce one podcast and one blog a week. This provides room for sustainability. Along those lines it gives more room to find people to interview who are building healthier whole lives in the meantime. It’s a start, and I’m still dreaming big, but I am honing into the wisdom I have learned from my past experiences.
How then do we turn up the whisper of our wisdom? Here are three possibilities
1. Keep the end in mind
This is nothing new. In fact, Stephen Covey covers it in-depth in his book “7 habits for highly effective people.” Make sure you have a destination for your life. As Simon Sinek puts it, this is your “WHY.”
Who are you wanting to become and how are the decisions you are making in the meantime helping that become a reality? The more you keep the end in mind, the easier it will be to listen to the wisdom you have gained when facing any decision.
2. Give it time
Before any decision, whether its financial, diet, or jobwise, take a pause. Even if it’s as little as whether to eat the cupcake or not. Provide space for yourself to stop, take a breath, and ultimately think about where you are trying to end up. I know this might sound silly when it comes to the small things but we live in such a fast-paced consumeristic world that we don’t often pause to think about what we’re doing.
One time when I had a job offer my mother-in-law gave me really good advice…Before you make any kind of decision allow yourself to feel the joy of the option for 24 hours. I understand not every decision has a 24-hour window, but the sentiment can cross many borders.
3. Future you is counting on you
Often, when I think about a positive habit or discipline, I wish I would have started I think, “Man two years ago I wanted to do this and I didn’t, imagine what I would have felt like two years later having done it.”
This is the place where after keeping the end in mind, and giving a decision time, you think about not wanting to having to repeat the above line to yourself once again down the road. I know this may come off a little negative, but in reality, future you will thank you for having this thought.
The more we get into the habit of thinking through these three thoughts, the louder our wisdom will become. Before long you will find you are person who makes decisions based on your wisdom rather than on a whim.