Is social media making you a jerk or were you already one?

Social Media. It’s great. It’s terrible. It’s everything in between.

There is a book out there titled something like “10 reasons why you should stop using social media.” One of the chapters is entitled “Because it is making you a Jerk,” and it’s actually more aggressive than that, but to make sure I don’t offend anyone, Jerk will suffice.

I’ve thought about that quite a bit, and I’ve come to this conclusion: Sure, I think that can be true, but I think for the most part if you’re a jerk now, you were probably a jerk before social media. Why?

I read through the book of proverbs constantly, and I love this line: “The purity of silver and gold is tested by putting them in the fire; The purity of human hearts is tested by giving them a little fame.”

What I believe that passage is saying is that when silver and gold are fully exposed we are able to see what they truly are, obviously. For instance if you throw ‘fools gold’ in the fire it will expose that its just a pretty rock. I think when humans begin to grow in influence and power, they don’t really change that much, rather who they really are is just exposed. I put money, alcohol, and social media on the same team. They don’t always have the power to change you (of course they can) but what they do by default is expose who you already are.

There is a line in a song that goes like this “the world became dangerous, the minute we all became famous.” The songwriter is, of course, addressing social media.

So allow me to circle back around to the chapter of that book that says social media “is making you a jerk.” In light of my deep scientific findings, it seems to me that social media is illuminating who people truly are. Uncle John didn’t just become a political loyalist because he liked a page on facebook…he already was, its just he never had the stage to tell 500 people at one time. The people who are always correcting other people in the comments didn’t just all of the sudden become opinionated because instagram and twitter made Mark Zuckerberg one of the most powerful people in the world.

They were already harshing everyones vibe and causing problems elsewhere, you just avoided them in real life.

Ok, so what’s my point? Basically just be a nicer human being. I’m not going to accept the excuse that the algorithm is strengthening peoples opinions. I definitely think that’s true, but they don’t get to be a turd because of it. If you are one of the good ones, start calling people out (in private, because that’s how the real OG leaders operate).

No more saying “What a weird time we live in…” or “Social media has made people so mean…” Nope. It’s time for those of us who truly want to see the world become a better place- to stand up and lead. Unfortunately we have to lead people back to second grade where they can learn how not to be the class bully.

So, in the meantime, what can we do if you still want to use the fun parts of social media? Personally, I have put a downtime monitor on my phone from 7pm to 7:30am, meaning only calls and text are accessible, everything else is unusable. I also set a 30 minute timer on my social media use. I love it, I feel less anxious, and have only done that for a week. I’d recommend unfollowing things that A) only strengthen your opinion, and B) people and pages that make you upset or discontented. Also, just work on being a kind human.